“My foot hurts"

Now is when we should probably introduce Gerard’s right foot. The said foot progressively got redder and more swollen over the first few days of our French adventure, something possibly accounted to a bite or insect sting but most likely a spider bite... Anyway long story short Gerard ends up in hospital on his second visit (1st in Bordeaux, 2nd Toulouse) and has a little bit of surgery – see photos if you’re game!!! A lovely trip to Southern France turns into ‘Le Tour De Hopital’ instead of Le Tour De France a la wine, cheese, walks and beach but there’s plenty more time for that.... The upside was a return via Paris on the train as I needed to keep my foot up – we needed to stay the night in Paris as it worked out cheaper to stay than go straight back to London.... 

PS. Gerard owes Bee one trip to France....

France - “Parlez-vous l’anglais?”

Bordeaux welcomed us with open arms, ha well, after a few bumps along the way... We were ready to tackle it though!!! Happy Bastille Day eve!

1. We got lost. It was midnight and dark and even the locals didn’t know where to go to get to our hotel!

2. Gerard got yelled at by an angry, drunk man on the Tramway for who knows what... we don’t speak much French!

3. The phone number for a taxi wouldn’t work, which we only realised once we got off the tram in the middle of nowhere....

4. Bee lost her walking shoes somewhere along the way and only realised the next morning...

5. We checked in to another hotel back in the city at about 2.00am and headed straight out for some food and wine. Mind you we were sans (without) a corkscrew and they put their chips INSIDE their kebabs!!! Sounds better than it really is....

This aside, the next morning we were ready to hit the streets! We moved accommodation to our campsite located on the Lac, hired some bikes for only 1Euro for the day and off we went. What a beautiful city.... We also headed on a wine tour the next day, as the Bordeaux region is obviously quite famous for its vineyards, tasting wines from two very different Chateau’s. The French version of Joan Brick (or otherwise known as our tour guide), wouldn’t stop to take a breath – frequently commenting on “the natural nature”, “the micro-climate” and “the importance of adapting to the geography”. Who knew making wine was more complex than just squashing some grapes???

London - “Yeah there are skyscrapers in London”

We are in London – and the first beer is a Peroni – go figure! After a 4.00am wake up call at Stansted airport (to the call of “thanks ladies and gents, time to move on. I know it’s early” (damn right it is). The 6.40am bus took us right in to the heart of London, peak hour. Hmmm. We found our accommodation at The Green Man hostel, and let us tell you we are definitely not ‘green with envy”! Shoebox size room, 45C sweltering heat and 9 dorm beds.... but the beer was great! We were also reminded of how small the world actually was as we met a colleague of Gerard’s cousin Amanda, who works in Singapore! He is obviously scouting for more teachers....

What better way to start a visit to London than the very touristy Buckingham Palace to witness the changing of the guard. Little action but lots of people! This was followed by a walk to visit Hyde Park, Wellington Arch, Oxford Street, Trafalgar Square, Piccadilly and several other Monopoly sites. Bee was very starry eyed...

The main aim of the first week was to attend some teaching agency meetings and start setting up bank accounts etc (quickly reminding us that we actually will need to do some work at some stage in the future), however we were still able to put the walking shoes on and take in some sites. It was also great to catch up with some Aussie mates in Hyde Park and relax with a drink or two...

Some observations from Week 1 in London:

• Public displays of affection, whilst common, are not the main form of public display. The other PDA (public display of abuse) is the main form, whereby females will yell uncontrollably into their mobiles on a busy street.

• The lack of skyscrapers in London is obviously attributed to the Londoners inability to stack a decent burger.

• We thought Wardy was great at singing in the shower, you should hear some of the guys singing in the park while riding their bikes!

After moving hostels a few times in four days, our last few nights before jetting off to France were spent in the famous Notting Hill with cousin Rita and Tim. Here we were introduced to Portobello Road, Market Thai and Moroccan fish. YUMMY!

“Wow, who booked this holiday”

We went tenpin bowling – highlight – Kuala Terengganu.

Luckily we got to KL in one piece and had a great night’s sleep at KLIA ready for our big trip to LONDON!!

Gerard - “You know, that diver” Bee - “Who, Stuart Diver?”

This isn’t a day but just shows that Bee is still old Bee....

“I thought it was a mozzie – but it was just my freckle”

The Perhentian Islands. We had such a lovely 8 nights, lazing around doing very little... See below for a few highlights and interesting times, hehehehe.

• Snorkelling: lots of fish and even a turtle! That is, after we almost got booted off our trip as they overbooked the numbers. PS. Our so called ‘waterproof’ camera may not work now...

• Walk around the top end of Perhentian Kecil: Gerard decided he was in need of some exercise (!) and we set off in the heat of the day through the jungle. Tracks, no tracks, snakes, lizards and falling coconuts were the order of the day.

• Gerard the stalker: spent many hours peering for the water monitors, hey there were anywhere up to 3m long, and may have been a tad scared too... Oh and not to mention him accidently walking in to the wrong chalet in the dark much to the surprise of the sleeping gals inside (who were from Geelong, by the way!)

• Canoeing: Wow, is Bee a great canoer!

• Gerard and Bee playing doctor and nurse to our chalet neighbour who may have bled to death if we were not there (thanks Mum for the first aid kit!!)

• The chalet move: being stalked by mozzies induced the first ‘I didn’t imagine it to be like this’ moment! Needless to say we moved accommodation after 2 nights to a place with a sturdy mozzie net and million dollar views for the hefty sum of 60RM per night, or less than $25AUD!

Well, we think the happy snaps tell the rest of the story...

“Ha ha, yes. How many, how many!”

The real action started when we arrived in Kota Bharu – we waited longer for the bus that never came (as in the one that went past after about 10mins and Bee says that’s not our bus) than our actual flight from KL... With a 70yo Muslim woman cracking up at us every five minutes, we weren’t exactly sure where to look. That is, until she and her companion hailed a taxi straight from the wreckers that looked at least 100 years old, and we jumped in next to them. Introducing “Mr.Man” - the taxi driver of taxi drivers. With his broken English and toothless smile (oopss, sorry there was one), he was a pisser. 6RM later and we were at our accommodation, the AR Garden Hostel. That’s pretty much all we have to say about Kota Bharu. Other than rats and cats of course....

 

Mr Man was the designated driver the next day to our jetty of Kuala Besut (1 hour - 30RM about 12 bucks) – the gateway to heaven. On the way he decides to partake in a conversation with Gerard. As is always the case Gerard bites off more than he can chew and decides to ask Mr Man in five different sentences how often per week he travels to Kuala Besut. Mr Man (obviously noting Gerard’s ability for a laugh) has absolutely no idea what Gerard is asking and laughs hysterically in agreement just about crashing into the tobacco fields “yes yes how many ha ha how many” and then turns and carries on his driving duties. After realising we had no money for the islands that, by the way had no ATMs, we decided to buy a bottle of vodka on the black market and we were on our way... We were travelling!

Malaysia - “I’m not going on any rides”

Well week one in Malaysia was an experience. Living in the Bronx otherwise known as Chow Kit brought about a delicacy of Malay foods and an introduction to rats and cats... We arrived at our hotel to find we were the only Westerners staying there, but that did not deter us from making the most of our sight seeing opportunities. Setting out on foot to explore the city (somewhat dirty but interesting), we sweated it up while seeing the Twin Towers, KL Tower and its accompanying cultural centre. Gerard even got up on stage to join in the traditional dancing!! When visiting the tourist centre Bee decides on day two of the trip to notify Gerard that she will not be partaking in any rides, of any sort (should have told me before we left!)

Highlights included the mona-doh otherwise known as the monorail and ‘Dr. Fish’ who ate the nasties off of our feet - needless to say that they had a feast on Bee’s big stompers... Maybe also the 1 ‘Ringy’ beers that were only 1 ringy after a first beer at a steep 30 ringy! Sucked in! Needless to say we got our money’s worth and didn’t quite make the soccer.